За Двумя Зайцами

Thankfully, in the midst of this national "quarantine," my friend Nastia is still brave enough to venture out-of-doors and visit. Earlier this week, Nastia and our friend, Lena, came over to watch an American movie (Return to Me), and the next day, Nastia came over to watch an old Soviet-made movie: За Двумя Зайцами (For Two Rabbits).


I was quite happy with myself, because I understood waaaay more of the movie than I thought I would. Don't get me wrong- Nastia still did a bit of translating, but I had warm fuzzies, knowing that I understood a chunk.

She explained to me that the name, "For Two Rabbits", comes from a Russian proverb meaning you can't chase after two opposing goals and win. You'll lose both if you divide your loyalties. The story is set in Kiev, pre-Bolshevik Revolution, and is about Свирид Петрович Голохвастов (our main character), who is greatly in debt and needs funds. He creates a scheme to woo Проню Прокоповну, whose family has quite a bit of money. Now, Проню Прокоповну is rich but certainly not classy, so our hero woos her but falls in love with another gal, Галю. In the process, his scheme is unearthed, and he ends up ruble-less and lady friend-less.

I started thinking about how this is true in my life. Here are some scenarios I came up with:
1. Efficiency AND Task Accomplishment
I cannot create and execute an efficient plan in Ukraine. Example: post office. Today, I was going to mail something to our central office in Kiev. I got up and headed to the post office, planning the timing so that it wouldn't be at a busy time of day. I got there in good time and had mentally prepared what I needed to say. I walked in and...Surprise! The entire post office is covered in tarps and scaffolding. Totally closed. Wasted trip into town.

2. Being American AND Being Ukrainian
I cannot remain my completely American self and assimilate into Ukrainian culture. Sometimes, I just can't sit on the bench. Why? Because Ukrainians believe that if women sit on cold surfaces, that will reduce fertility. If I sit down, I will either offend them or they will yell at me. Sometimes, I have to force down the multiple cups of scalding, not-sweet-enough tea. Or wear a hat when I'm not cold. Or eat another helping when I'm already full to capacity. All in an effort to mold myself into my new culture.

3. Pride AND Servanthood
I can't truly be a servant if I'm always focused on coming out looking good. Motive counts.

I think I'm turning into a philosopher during Flu Season...